I like the way you work it. No diggity.

I sing that to myself every morning when I walk into work. If I don’t treat myself like the badass I am, who will?

Tomorrow is the end of my second week of my summer job at a law firm and I’ve learned so many new things! For instance, don’t email the woman who has 243 unread emails in her inbox for help. Chances are she won’t answer and you’ll miss a chance to sit in with a partner in a new client meeting.

Me when I found out I missed my 10 AM meeting with a partner

Talk about a great impression! I’m so glad that I was able to finish a brief instead of selling myself like career services told me to do. Speaking of other things career services told us to do, they never told us how to handle a happy hour with the firm. I mean, it seemed easy enough: go to the happy hour, DO NOT get drunk, tell a few stories/make everybody fall in love with me/make them realize I would be perfect to offer a job to and then go home. Unfortunately, they never said what to do if the partners go on about their houses and boats in the Hamptons and how to handle the feelings of mediocrity.

Here are some other tidbits of advice I picked up:

Tip #1. Always be the best dressed intern in the office. If you don’t have great business clothes (like me), just pray the other interns dress worse than you. AKA always keep a pair of heels and a blazer at work and only wear your hair in a ponytail once a week.
Tip #2. If your firm says there is free coffee in the kitchen, and to help yourself to it, drink 24 ounces a day to show them that you take their advice seriously. Whenever you get coffee, rush back to your seat so you look incredibly busy and stressed so they can see you mean business
Tip #3: Pray that you sit in a desk that everybody has to walk by first thing in the morning. This way everybody will see you were there earlier than them and left later than them. Also, hope that seat is by a bathroom because there’s nothing worse than walking across the entire floor 12 times a day because of that 24 oz coffee you drank.
Tip #4: If badges are required to get into the building, make sure that you’re going into the right one. Nothing makes you look like a stupid child if the security guard has to inform you that it’s the wrong building and that’s why the badge isn’t working, but because you thought the magnetic part was removed because it was next to your credit card.
Tip #5: Treat this job like it’s a two month job interview. Ask for advice and feedback often. If they have nothing to give you, it means that they don’t care or you are so perfect they can’t find a single fault with your work, personality, or overall being (aka me). If activities and events are planned, attend and socialize.
Tip #6: If grades come out while at work, it’s probably in the best interests of everybody around you if you either: (a) don’t check or (b) bring your makeup into the bathroom, check, cry, and then go back to work. The best lawyers can power through the rough times and fall apart later, at home, in the comfort of sweatpants and lots of donuts.
Tip #7: Every partner was once where you are right now and they know it sucks. Go to them for help and ask questions. When all else fails, just quote Legally Blonde.

PS: JUNE 5TH IS NATIONAL DONUT DAY. DUNKS WILL HAVE FREE DONUTS. BE FREE AND EAT DONUTS!

PPS: Be sure to keep a running list of all the work completed and all observations that you go to. This way, if you’re trying to get a job out of it, you’re already prepared with what you’ve done.

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4 thoughts on “I like the way you work it. No diggity.

  1. Be careful on #2 and #3, though. Summers are usually not given the complicated stuff (rock star stand-out, excepted, of course), and being seen as too stressed out or taking too long on a “light” assignment might give people the wrong impression –the powers that be are trying to find someone they can count on (2 month interview) to handle the crazy and complicated and urgent items.

    Make friends with the assistants. They will make or break your career. Treat them nicely. Take them to lunch. Get to know them. Don’t abuse your right to order them around. A good assistant will never let you miss a meeting. Friendship with a partner’s assistant will make getting access to that partner much easier.

    When people talk about Hamptons and boats, they’re talking about getting away. Steer them towards talking about their vacations. Have a couple funny and short (stress on short) vacation stories of your own.

    Yep, I’ve been assigned as a mentor too many times. 😛

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    1. I completely agree! I put them in there more for he humor of working in a new place and going above and beyond to make the impression that you’re the right fit and know everything.

      At my firm, everybody there gives feedback often so even when there’s no actual assignments to do, the legal interns get to revise their work or attend court/depos. Luckily, it’s not big law so we don’t have as much pressure to constantly turn out assignments or to come in early/leave late b

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